Magic Mike
by karatekid1018
Summary: Kurt and Blaine go to see "Magic Mike". They're having a great time...until Blaine sees something he's pretty sure he can never unsee. Cracky, humorous oneshot-Rated T


**I had to do this. Really. Seriously. **

** Enjoy!**

"Blaine, remind me again _why _we're seeing 'Magic Mike'?" Kurt asked in annoyance, taking his seat next to Blaine in the movie theatre crowded with squealing teenage girls and single moms.

"_Because_, Kurt, my brother forbade me from seeing it, and I love doing _anything _to get under that California-tanned skin of his," Blaine said mischievously.

"Oh, so you're not going to get jealous by me watching a movie involving almost naked men and that had a commercial that said 'you'll wish you were single'?" Kurt questioned incredulously.

"Nope," Blaine said, popping the 'p' cheekily. "I trust you enough not to run out of the movie theatre and drive all the way to California, lusting after Channing Tatum. And hey, you said you hadn't even seen the commercial."

"Yeah, well, Cheerios need to learn to keep their voices down while they're squealing about male strippers," Kurt replied. Blaine beamed at him, taking his hand and intertwining their fingers.

"You're beautiful, you know that?" he asked with his voice low and sweet. Kurt could feel his face flush brightly, cringing at the thought of how many shades of red his pale skin must've been.

"Well, if you can, you never seem to let a moment go by without informing me of that, so yes, I guess I do know by now," Kurt replied, trying to avert his eyes from his boyfriend's intense gaze.

"Hey, none of that," Blaine said, lightly grasping Kurt's jaw to turn his beautiful eyes back towards his. "While it's adorable, you don't have to be shy around me. You're beautiful, Kurt, inside and out."

Kurt smiled brilliantly, leaning in to connect his and Blaine's lips lightly.

"I love you," his whispered against Blaine's lips.

"I love you too, my blushing beauty," Blaine replied, once again eliciting a bright red blush from his boyfriend. "Oh, shh, it's starting!"

As the movie progressed, Blaine had to admit that the actors were certainly…admirable.

"Remind me to thank you for taking me to this," Kurt murmured, sipping his Diet Coke. "God, Channing Tatum has the greatest abs ever."

"Better than mine?" Blaine asked jokingly. Kurt chuckled, lifting up the armrest so he could slip easily into Blaine's warm embrace.

"No one's are better than yours, babe," Kurt commented coyly, stroking Blaine's stomach over his shirt. Blaine smiled, pecking Kurt on the forehead before turning his attention back to the screen.

"OK, I _definitely _don't want to know what he has to do to get twenties," Blaine whispered.

"Liar," Kurt joked. Blaine shoved him playfully, leaning over to give him a long, sweet kiss. "I love you…and your abs."

"Thank you," Blaine said with a small chuckle. "I love you too."

Blaine turned his gaze back to the screen…and recoiled in horror.

"Oh my God," he murmured in terror, trying not to get too loud. "Is that my _brother_?"

"I think it is," Kurt said, his hands held up in front of him in a defensive position. "Oh dear God, this is why he didn't want us to see this!"

"Holy hell," Blaine muttered as his brother ended up in his underwear. His eyes widened in shock as the scene continued, and he could've sworn that he could feel the movie theatre popcorn about to come back up. "We're getting out of here. _Now_."

"Agreed," Kurt said, pulling Blaine from the seat and out of the movie theatre. The two sat in Kurt's car afterwards, Blaine desperately trying to cleanse his mind of the horrifying images.

"I made the right choice, you know," Kurt said, climbing into Blaine's lap and letting his legs dangle off to the side. He wrapped his arms around Blaine's neck, resting his temple on Blaine's broad shoulder.

"What do you mean?" Blaine asked. Kurt smiled up at him.

"I got the best Anderson brother."

"Oh, but what about the 'best looking man in North America'?" Blaine asked. He obviously meant it to sound like he was joking, but there was a slight bit of bitterness in his tone of voice.

_Oh God,_ Kurt thought_, I never apologized for that_.

"Blaine," Kurt said firmly. "I was _stupid_. I was star-struck and completely ignored the fact that your brother made you a bit uncomfortable, and I'm sorry. He's not the most handsome man in North America, _you _are. You're the most handsome man in the _world, _baby."

Blaine ducked his head down slightly with a shy smile.

"Hey, none of that," Kurt joked, lifting Blaine's head. "If I don't get to be shy with you, then you can't be shy with me."

"It's a deal," Blaine said, leaning in for a kiss. "Lima Bean?" Kurt smiled brightly.

"Lima Bean."

**Basically a cracky little humor oneshot because honestly who **_**wasn't **_**thinking of this when they saw Matt Bomer was in Magic Mike?**

** By the way, I've never seen Magic Mike, so I don't know if Matt Bomer came on before the line about the twenties, so sorry about that!**

** Review?**


End file.
